You saw your naked mother as a child but your young mind could not grasp the raw sexuality of the scene before you. However, this laid the foundation for wanted to peep at women. You are ultimately straight. However, you will be forever held back by the idea of the ultimate, beautiful, untouchable woman.
IE, your mother.>>12040262
Futanari is more of a narcissistic type of thing. You enjoy your own penis so much, you wish that the objects of your sexual desire could share that joyous feeling of ejaculation. You have over valued you own sexual workings and experiences to the point that you either completely dismiss the female sexual experience or pair it with something you deem superior.