Subaru is the love of my life.
No girl could ever be as cool and sexy as my precious Subaru. Every day I sit and watch Nanoha StrikerS for hours on end, when she gets hurt in battle I hurt myself, when she cries I cry too, and when she smiles I reach over and touch the cold screen in the desperate hope that one day I might be able to fall through the monitor and we can be together. People say that my Subaru is gay but I know that's not true, I'm sure that we could be so happy together, we'd go for walks in the countryside, I'd buy her nice clothes to wear and I'd treat her like the princess she truly is. One day she'll tearfully tell me about her tragic background and I'll gently wipe the tears from her soft cheeks and then tenderly kiss her quivering lips. She'll wrap her arms tightly around me and I'll bask in her warmth knowing that I've finally found true happiness.
Until then I'll continue my daily ritual, hour upon hour in front of the screen as my body slowly withers, crumbles and then turns to dust. I'm waiting for you my love, please come and save me soon.